July  07, 2007:

 Here are some random pics of stuff that we did in the month of June.  The boys had their summer piano recital in early June.  Patrick's piano piece was called "Range Rider" and Jarod played "The Entertainer".  They are so freakin' talented and I'm not just sayin' that cuz I'm their mother. hehe.  Then Jarod had his 10 year old birthday party-sleepover with a whole bunch of his friends.  It was a mad house here, totally chaotic but nonetheless a great time was had by all.  Then once the boys were done with school, they started up summer camp. (no pics) And towards the end of the month, we went up to Seattle to watch the Red Sox play the Mariners.  Unfortunately, they lost, in extra innings.  Now that you're all caught up, the latest and greatest news is that we will be going back to Boston for an extended vacation.  I'm looking forward to spending as much time as I can with all my friends and family.  I'm hoping to make some great memories while I'm there and sharing some nice bonding moments.  C-ya guys soon!

May 31, 2007:

I had a weird dream this morning.  I was walking up a continuous flight of stairs and when I looked back, the stairs behind me were crumbling into dust.  Even if I wanted to, I couldn't turn back down the flight of stairs.  All I know is that I need to continue moving forward.  I'm really not sure what the whole thing means but the imagery stayed with me for the rest of the day.  I like my dreams cause they're very bizarre sometimes. 

Dreams have always fascinated me. Sometimes I think the reason we dream is so the subconscious mind can decipher and process the daily happenings in our waking lives.  Other times I'll have dreams of people from my past and it's like they're haunting me, but in a good way, I guess.  It's a reminder that even though they are gone, they're always a part of us. 

For example, last month I had a dream about my grandmother (my mom's mom). She was the head matriarch of the Gee/Wong Clan.  She had a fiery temper and raise us kids with a firm hand.  I'm so appreciative of that.  It kept us kids humble... and out of trouble. She also had a softer side, too.  It was this kinder, gentler persona that came to me in my dreams last month. 

In my dream, she came up to me and wrapped her arms around me in a warm embrace.  When I woke up that morning I could still felt her presence.  I clung to the remnants of that dream because I wanted to hang on to those feeling of comfort and nurture by my grandma.  Mind you, she wasn't too huggy-feely and touchy in real life.  In fact, I don't really recall her being too openly affectionate with us kids unless you consider a hard knuckle-tap-to-the-head as an expression of warmth. Hehe. Ow. But, when I really needed her, she was there.

 I knew after that moment no matter what happens in life, everything was going to be alright. At the time, I was feeling very depressed and still mourning the loss of my cousin as well as dealing with a lot of emotional and personal issues.  I just needed a little comforting and I was surprised that it was her that came to me in my dream.  It was odd because the last time I had a dream about her was when she passed away back in 1999.  I was so depressed and saddened by the loss of both grandparents. She appeared to me in a dream back then, too.  In that dream she was laughing with her hand covering her smile.  Up until last month I haven't had a dream about her at all.  It's truly bizarre.

There's really nothing more to say that hasn't already been said.  When making  choices in life I hope and pray that I make the right decisions.  What is right for me may not be right for others.  I have to respect the fact that we're all entitled to our own thoughts, feelings and beliefs.  I need to be honest with myself because that's the only way of life that's truly worth living.

I can't change the past but I can learn from it.  Some lessons are harder to learn than others.  The hardest thing about life is learning to let go.  I know I have a tendency to cling to stability and familiarity because I don't really like "change".  But I'm very much aware that life is ephemeral and so either I try to evolve or stagnate and die.  Nothing lasts forever.  I'm not the same person I was 10 years ago.  I'm not going to be the same person 10 years from now.  I fully believe that I should always strive to become a better person in life.

I will always be grateful for the experiences that have shaped the course of my life up to this point.  I don't have any regrets.  None.  I will always be thankful to those people that have influenced my life for the better or for the worst.  Life is very bittersweet.  I know that now.  I will always be appreciative of the life lessons learned along the way and I will forever cherish the memories of the past.  I look forward to the new memories and experiences the future has to offer.   Life is too fleeting, so I'm going to make the most of it.